by james bezerra
Your spacecraft’s telemetry
is wobbling dangerously!
Fire your retrorockets quickly
if you want to stabilize your reentry,
otherwise we might have a tragedy!
Hey Mission Control
We’re gonna have to go
to manual control
because our spacecraft has gone into a roll.
You’ve gone into a roll?
Did you experience a failure
of your gyroscopic computer?
So tell your engineers
that if we live
I’m going to kick their rears.
Oh they have ears
and they can hear.
That’s a punishment they’ll surely fear.
You know, it’s more likely
that the problem is user error
than a catastrophic computer failure.
You know, I don’t wanta hear it.
I’m busy trying to avoid a giant comet.
A giant comet?!
Our recent scan
showed no comet in your flight plan.
We had to go to Plan B.
So after this comet is averted
we will have to ditch in the sea.
Rescue teams have been alerted,
however we still fear
you’ll burn up in the atmosphere.
That’s a negative.
We will totally live
because the atmosphere
is quite thin here.
Um ... yeah, it’s probably likely
you made a wrong turn at that last galaxy
and you’re about to land on the wrong planet.