What My Pants Mean.

Today I went to the drycleaner. I was picking up some pants that were being repaired. My dry cleaner has the skill of a tailor and the heart of an optimist when it comes to repairing the crotch of a pair of blue jeans and I love her for it. Somehow I always manage to wear holes in the crotches of blue jeans. I don’t know how or why this is, but I do know that it is true. In my opinion blue jeans are worth spending a little bit of money on and so I’m okay with spending a little extra to have the crotch holes sewn up. You’re welcome America.

So today I went to the drycleaner to pick up my repaired blue jeans only I had lost the blue receipt ticket for them and so she had to pull up my account and when she did so she discovered that I had other stuff there too.

Other stuff? I wondered, What other stuff? For a second I had a little fantasy where I was going to be given a suit that didn’t belong to me but would fit perfectly and so I would start wearing it every day and one day I would discover that sewn into the lining of the jacket there was a motherfucking treasure map!

That was what I imagined.

In reality what my dry cleaner returned with were three of my favorite button down shirts which I had taken there so long ago that I had forgotten about them. Can you believe that?! Two white shirts and a gray one with black buttons.

I was so happy to see them! Then I was sad when she told me that I had brought them in in January. More than seven months ago! For more than seven months I had been without some of my favorite shirts and I didn’t even know it. How very very sad is that? And how had I gone that long without them without knowing that I was without them? And what does that mean? WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!

Well, it probably MEANS very little. However, it certainly means that for awhile I had been living a life wherein I didn’t ever get to wear my favorite shirts. And that, frankly, is no good. Let’s all do less of that, shall we?

If you see me walking around tomorrow in a pair of blue jeans with a recently resewn crotch and wearing a nice, starched gray button=down shirt with black buttons, well then you’ll know why: life is too short to not be wearing the clothes you want. Or - you know - not living the way that you want. I guess that’s what it all MEANS.

.
.
.