Tuesday, September 28, 2010

An Open Letter from the Future by james Bezerra



An Open Letter from the Future
by james Bezerra

There are a host of things for which we would like to apologize.

Right away we would like to apologize for initially angering so much the giant, pink space robots who would eventually become the overlords of the human race. In retrospect, we probably should have been more polite.

More generally though, we would like to apologize for the egregious manner in which we so thoroughly squandered your good will, hope, and potential, in all of their forms. Sadly, as much as you mean to, we never did get around to curbing those greenhouse gasses, harnessing the power of the wind and sun, or separating once and for all our churches and our states. We know that you are genuinely concerned about passing your polluted present onto your children, so please take some small solace in the fact that we – your children – are not encumbered by such heavy concerns of our own, given the fact we have all been sterilized by our pink robot overlords.

As we live out our final days on this flooded planet – devoid as it now is of ice caps – we have some time to reflect – when not working for the overlords in the silicon mines – on what we might have done differently.

For instance, we probably should not have spent so much time, effort, and money bombing poor people of different nationalities. We have come to an informal agreement – Jews, Muslims, Hindis, Christians, Americans, Iranians, Russians, Peruvians, etc. – that if we could go back and do it all over, we would settle conflicts of every size with cotton candy eating contests. Perhaps you still have time to enact this revision!

We all also agree that perhaps we resorted to that big thermonuclear war too quickly and enthusiastically. We have now all come to agree that all those detonations probably attracted the attention of pink overlords in the first place and caused them to set a course to our little blue world.

In retrospect, had we just been nicer to one another, listened to one another, and shared our resources rather than fought thermonuclear wars over them, perhaps we would not be in these dire straights. Perhaps you might want to enact those revisions as well. Perhaps you can still change the trajectory of your collective fate. If that is too much to ask however, then please just take this other, more simple, advice: be polite to the giant, pink space robots when they arrive. What they lack in humanity, they make up for in reciprocity.

To sum up, we are sincerely sorry that we made such a mess of your future. We hope that looking forward to a bleak, awful and dystopic future does not sap you of the ability to lead happy lives. If it does, we apologize for that too.



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