Showing posts with label awesomeness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label awesomeness. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Stilts!




Some workdays are very stressful and leave you simply wanting to go the hell home and take a nap. I have had a lot of those days lately. However today was not one of them. Yes, it was long and yes it was stressful, but I came out of it feeling okay. I think this is largely due to the fact that I got to put on my thinking cap and figure some stuff out. I will spare you the nasty details, but I’m taking on a lot of new job functions at work but not really being relieved of any of my old ones. The other day I explained this to the owner of the company and he flippantly told me to ‘get things automated’ meaning that I should find a way to boil my less complex functions down to logic programming. So you know what? I fucking did! I can never fully express how awesome it is to be awesome!

So I set my brain to some of that out-of-the-box thinking that everybody always talks about all of the time but never actually does. And I think that I have figured out how to reduce, not one, but TWO different soul-sucking, day-long processes into Access macros that will take like ten fucking minutes, total! With the (earth-shakingly badass) help of our in-house programmer I think that by the end of the month I will be able to turn 16 man houses of work into something that is more like thirty minutes. How fricken’ cool is that?! (You may applaud now.)

The point of this rant is that I was already feeling pretty good about myself when I hopped in the car and drove back to my apartment. Then, on the way, I heard a story on NPR about … do you wanta guess? … about competitive stilt jousting. Yeah. I said: Competitive. Stilt. Jousting.

This is why NPR is the best. This story is as hilarious as it is awesome. It was the cherry on top of my day.

READ (or listen) ALL ABOUT IT!

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Thursday, March 31, 2011

Yay For The Pixies!

What the Beatles are to some people, that’s what the Pixies are to me.

Check this out, it’s pretty cool.




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Friday, March 11, 2011

Speaking of Unicorns!




Special thanks to Comfortably Recovering Annette for knowing how much joy this would bring me.

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Tuesday, January 4, 2011

The Future Has Slipped.

Please read this article. It will blow your mind. Or possibly already has.


Could It Be? Spooky Experiments That 'See' The Future
by Robert Krulwich


Later today you are going to do something, something you don't know about yet.

Yet somehow, it's already happened. Somehow, it's already affected you.

Huh?

Did Alice know?
One of the most respected, senior and widely published professors of psychology, Daryl Bem of Cornell, has just published an article that suggests that people — ordinary people — can be altered by experiences they haven't had yet. Time, he suggests, is leaking. The Future has slipped, unannounced, into the Present. And he thinks he can prove it.

Already critics are jumping up and down, saying this can't be, time is not porous, the experiments are flawed. But because this is the Professor Daryl Bem (he's in your high school textbook for his work on self perception) and because the journal publishing his article is top-of-the-line rigorous, all over the world psychologists are trying to duplicate what Dr. Bem has done. If serious scientists can repeat his results, this story is going to be big.

Two Very Queer Experiments
But while we're waiting, let me tell you what he did. (Or at least what I think he did. I'm not a psychology buff, so I hope I get this right) The details are fascinating.

Dr. Bem has been quietly testing extrasensory perception claims for 8 years. His paper reports a series of 9 different experiments, but two especially caught my eye.

Experiment Number 1: Who's Got the Porn?
The first is a computer quiz. 100 Cornell students, 50 males, 50 females, were invited to sit in front of some computers. Here are Bem's instructions:

This is an experiment that tests for ESP. It takes about 20 minutes and is run completely by computer. First you will answer a couple of brief questions. Then, on each trial of the experiment, pictures of two curtains will appear on the screen side by side. One of them has a picture behind it; the other has a blank wall behind it. Your task is to click on the curtain that you feel has the picture behind it. The curtain will then open, permitting you to see if you selected the correct curtain. There will be 36 trials in all. Several of the pictures contain explicit erotic images (e.g., couples engaged in nonviolent but explicit consensual sexual acts). If you object to seeing such images, you should not participate in this experiment.

OK, that's two curtains. One is hiding nothing. The other hides a picture, often a hot picture with much nakedness.

Since a computer randomly chooses what's behind each curtain, one would expect the students to choose correctly half the time. Fifty-fifty.

But that is not how it turned out. In the 100 sessions, the hit rate for those shown erotic stimuli was 53.1 percent. Why? It could have been a fluke, but with the results session after session consistently better than random, one explanation might be that the subjects somehow 'knew' that a particular choice would be especially arousing. How did they know? One possibility is that the tasty reward of "hot action" somehow got passed backwards through time more effectively. (Don’t laugh: The hit rate of those shown non-erotic picures, at 49.8 percent, did not deviate from chance. Curious.)

Sexual Arousal Going Backwards in Time?

Weirder still, Bem reports that the news appeared to arrive at the brain before the computer made its choice. "The remarkable finding [we made] is that their physiological responses are observed to occur about 2-3 seconds prior to the appearance of the picture, even before the computer has decided whether to present a non-arousing or an arousing picture," Bem told the Cornell Daily Sun.

Here's the second study.

Everybody knows practice improves performance. If you study a list of words, if you try to memorize them, you should be able to remember them better later. But suppose you reverse the process? Suppose you study the words after the test? Your friends will smirk. "After the test is too late, loser. People who study after tests don't graduate."

Well, let's see.

In one of Bem's studies, 100 college students were shown a list of 48 common nouns flashed on a computer, one at a time, for three seconds each. The instructions said: Look at the word, try to visualize it (see "tree;" imagine "tree") and then go on to the next word.

Afterward, they were told, Surprise! We're going to give you a quick memory quiz. How many of the words we just showed you can you recall?

Students typed in the words they remembered.

Then a computer went through the same list of words and chose 24 — totally randomly; no human was involved.

Before you leave, the students were told, we still want you to scan and then type the words the computer selected. As they typed, the students were, of course, committing those randomly selected words to memory. But who cares? The test was over.

Did The Future Whisper The Answers?
Now comes the surprise. When Dr. Bem checked the original surprise recall test, a weird pattern emerged. He noticed the students for some reason turned out to be better at recalling the words they had scanned and retyped after the test.

A second group of 24 words served as a control. The computer never asked students to retype them. Those words weren't recalled as often.

Then Bem drops his bomb: "The results show that practicing a set of words after the recall test does, in fact, reach back in time to facilitate the recall of those words."

What? Apparently, scanning and retyping those words later somehow improved recall earlier. Cue the Twilight Zone music.

You can well understand why this paper is raising hackles all over psychology-ville. This is not the first time a prominent psychology professor has found statistical evidence of extrasensory perception, but in these experiments, the methods are classical, simple, well known and repeatable. Already one attempt to repeat Bem's work has failed.

For me (untrained in these matters) the niggling question is Bem's numbers: 53.1 percent is slightly better than chance. It's not 50-50, but is this really significant? The effect shows up across nine different experiments, involving more than a thousand subjects. So the effect in cumulative. But is that enough?

Here's what Melissa Burkley writes in her blog at Psychology Today:

...small effect sizes are not that uncommon in psychology (and other sciences). For example, on average, the Bem studies showed an effect size of .20 (out of a possible range of 0-1). Although that is fairly small, it is as large as or larger than some well-established effects, including the link between aspirin and heart attack prevention, calcium intake and bone mass, second hand smoke and lung cancer, and condom use and HIV prevention (Bushman & Anderson, 2001). And as Cohen has pointed out, such small effect sizes are most likely to occur in the early stages of exploring a topic, when scientists are just starting to discover why the effect occurs and when it is most likely to occur.
So who knows? Maybe psychologists, like quantum physicists, will have to deal with the deep strangeness of our universe. Maybe time doesn't behave properly. Maybe it makes little leaps, suddenly appears uninvited when porn is in the air. Or maybe not.

It's not like we've never thought about this before. In his paper Bem recalls that in "Through the Looking Glass," the White Queen casually mentions to Alice that in her realm, "memory works both ways."

Not only does the Queen remember past events, she can also remember "things that happened the week after next."

Alice, always puzzled, says "I'm sure mine only works one way...I can't remember things before they happen." The Queen seems a little sorry for Alice. "It's a poor sort of memory that only works backwards," she says.

In a year or so, Bem coolly suggests, we may have to agree with the Queen.


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You can also read this at NPR.com

Monday, November 15, 2010

The Botany of Desire.



If you like having your socks blown off by unadulterated fascination, then have I got a movie for you!

The Botany of Desire.

It is probably the most interesting documentary I have seen in ages. Basically it explores the relationship between plants and animals by concentrating on the various ways that people and plants have influenced one another throughout history.

It concentrates specifically on potatoes, tulips, marijuana and apples.

I know that you’re thinking, “Um, Jamie, why do you want me to watch a movie about plants?”

I get it, but just watch the first ten minutes; if you can turn it off after that I will personally mail you a potato.


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Friday, October 1, 2010

Slaughterhouse Five, Live.



Holy shit! A stage adaptation of Slaughterhouse Five. I am going to go see this and you are all coming with me. Done.

I am so excited!

Check out

The Action Theatre Company.


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Monday, September 20, 2010

I Have an IMDB Page!!!

That’s right bitches! At long last I have an IMDB page!

It is pretty sparse and more info about the movie is being added one little bit at a time, but there it is: it is like I’m a real person!

Check it out: HERE!!!


And if you're curious, here is the website for the movie.

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Friday, August 13, 2010

What’s Up? Do You Like Awesomeness?



I am doing a reading!

On Wednesday August 18th I am part of a reading at The Rumor Mill in Culver City. It is a little coffee shop that’s so badass you can get them to make you a grilled cheese sandwich. Also, while I didn’t actually have any of their quiche, I looked at it pretty hard and let me tell you, I could almost taste it through my eyes, that's how good it is. Plus the chocolate chip cookie that I had was really good . . .

Anyway!

Come out and see me read. They have given me 30 WHOLE MINUTES! One time, at a reading, I made a girl cry, and that time I only had seven minutes. This time I’m going to be reading a story that has like fifteen separate dialogue speakers in it, it’s gonna be a one-man show for 1,800 seconds and you will be sad if you miss it.

Check out this link for details.

If you wanta come in from out of town for this one, you can crash on my couch. I am so excited. It is going to be EPIC!


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Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Songs For My Band's Next Album.

So if you have read this blog before, you know that I am in a completely fake band. We don’t practice or play and that’s good because most of us can’t actually play what you might call ‘traditional’ instruments anyway.

Myself, I play the variable-speed blender and I am getting quite good (not actually) at the harmonica.

What our band does do, however, is amass good song titles. Below are some of the better and best that we have come up with lately.

Tell me that you don’t want to hear these songs. Seriously. Say it with a straight face.


Some of the awesome songs for our next album:


The Rusty Lush

Tasks Heroic and Necessary

Hot Foggy Glasses - (this is stolen from Eggplant).

Infrared Love Story

The East German Mummy Mania Project

Naked Shower Ghost – (this is stolen from Eggplant & The Captain)

Hot and Damp (like laundry)

Electric Shakespeare

Static Kill

Pavilion of Wigs

Chronic Love Captive

Glorious Defilement

A Growing Constellation

The American Asylum

Slunk Traffickers Trail a Pregnant Cow - (this is stolen from William Burroughs)

Fallacy is the only Phallus I got

Lunar Parking is Easy to Find

Burned Nickel is Burnished Metal

Don’t Stop Unless I Say the Safe Word



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Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Real American (Folk) Hero.

Have you seen this yet?!

It is an animation of what the hell exactly happened when that Jet Blue flight attendant flipped the fuck out. Watch and please enjoy the fact that it is true and accurate.



If you want more, here is an article about the whole thing.

I love that the tag for this article on Yahoo.com asked the question: Criminal or folk hero?

I vote for folk hero. Badass, beer-thieving, inflatable slide-using, super-gay folk hero.

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