The Ethos of Dentists.

I recently got to see some of the mid-term political ads that are running in not-where-I-live (they don’t bother running many political ads in Southern California) and it’s funny because in the Freshman English class where I am almost-a-teacher we have been dealing with pathos, ethos, and logos. Ethos is always a tricky one to understand. It is basically an appeal to credibility, like: 4 out of 5 dentists agree that brushing your teeth is a good thing.

Political ads though seem to use a different form of this rhetorical appeal. Political ads are more like: 4 out of 5 dentists agree that the 5th dentist is an asshole.

The really fun ads are the ones that invoke President Obama as the 5th dentist. Below I have written a midterm ad that the RNC should feel free to use, because it is as good as everything else they are producing, but also because it demonstrates the inversion of ethos that seems to just be the norm now.

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Songs For My Band's Next Album.

So if you frequent this blog you already know this, but I am in a completely fake band. We don’t ever get together or play music and most of us lack any musical ability whatsoever, to say nothing of musical interments (for my part, I play the variable-speed blender and have actually been getting quite good at it).

In addition to never getting together to practice, we also don’t write any songs. However, I do keep collecting good song titles for – what I believe, anyway – would be delightful and interesting songs. Below are all of the titles for my band’s next album (which will, of course, never actually be produced. How cool is that? Beat that hipsters!).

Enjoy:



Has Been Work Hard Enough

Jogging on the Beach in a Headband

Jogging on the Beach in Just a Headband

The Morse Code of Your Heartbeat

The Brail of Your Skin

Heartache in the Headlines

Naked Noir

The Ash Box (I stole this from Eggplant)

Interactive Internet TV Ruined My Marriage

The Anorexia Engine

Dirty Teenage Group Sex In the Park (I stole this from Eggplant)

It’s Not a Sin Unless You’re Seen

Friends I Don’t Remember Anymore

The Cool Jazz Jam Session in My Heart

I Can’t Stop Not Getting Over You

Njord, The North Sea Sea-God

Dentistry is a Scam


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