About My Pants ...

So ever since I became a fancy person with a blog and a website and all of the other trappings of fame, I have been bombarded with emails from legions of adoring readers who ask things like,

"This website has the word ‘kink’ in the name, yet it seems to have no discernable porn, what’s the deal?"

or

"Why are you not a cute girl who would like to have sex with me? As a person who devotes much of his free time to searching the internet for cute girls to have sex with, I was astounded to learn (from the ‘About’ page of your website) that you are, in fact, not a cute girl who would like to have sex with me. What’s up with that?"

Yet it seems that more than any other question, people ask me, "So what’s going on with your pants situation?"

Well, I have decided that I should finally address this, so as to clear it up once and for all.

When I get home I generally put on this great pair of blue jeans that I bought on sale at Kohls. Kohl’s has some great stuff and they carry some good brands and when they have a sale … well, you just can’t beat it (I paid $9, they were marked down from $60 – though I hade to remove the bandana and chain wallet thing that came attached to them. Who still thinks that crap is cool? I propose that it never was, but that’s for another day).

Anyway, I do not believe in washing jeans as often as regular clothes, in fact, I think that jeans don’t even get comfortable until you wear them two of three (hundred) times.

Well today when I got home I went to put my jeans on and I noticed that they kind of smelled like the ground and so I tried to think back to when I washed them last and I simply could not recall. I remember the last few times I did laundry and I did not wash them then, so that means that it has probably been like three or four weeks. Weeks, yes.

But they had been fitting so great!

So it is with some sadness now that I have to relate to you, dear reader, that I have gone ahead and tossed my jeans into the washer (along with other stuff, of course).

I will let you know how all of this turns out, but I suspect that once my jeans are clean, they will no longer fit in the same perfect manner that they did yesterday.

Why is my life so hard?

It really is difficult to be me sometimes.

Anyway, I hope that finally answers that burning question as to what the situation is with my pants. I hope this helps.

Love always,
j.