Olympic events I could be competitive in (if they existed):
Sleeping poorly.
Podcast listening.
Getting myself worked up about people who won’t get vaccinated.
Fogging up my own glasses while wearing a mask.
Missing messages on Facebook because I don’t go on it anymore.
Finding the cheapest bottle of red wine in any store.
Having dreams where I explain to people how the mail works.
Singing songs to my cat about my cat and not having them appreciated by my cat.
Always having the closed captioning on.
Buying fruit and then not eating it.
Slowly killing my own herb garden.
Making lists.
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