Thursday, February 4, 2016

Songs for My Band’s Next Album.



Many of you know that I am in a completely hypothetical band. We don’t - you know - actually “play music” or “own instruments”, we simply exist as a band in the universe. Pretty much anybody can be in the band. Do you want to be in our band? POOF! You’re in the band. Congratulations.

Over the years I have been compiling a list of songs that I will never write. The songs below will be on our forthcoming album which will never be written, recorded, or released. Enjoy!



The Abstract Machine

Your Unengineered Moral Architecture is Crumbling

The Root Book

Magical Realism on the Great Plains

Binary Logic is the Spiritual reality of the root-tree

Too Thin Information

The Abortionists of Unity

Pay to the Order of Disorder!

The Alligator Knows an Eskimo

The Charming Crimes I Commit

Flat Multiplicities of
n Dimensions

That Gun-Penis Thing

What We Do in the 6th Floor Stairwell

Microfascisms

White Dudes Speaking for Other People

Your Wikipedia of Desire

Follow the Plants

Pop Nihilism

Heavy Metal Hanukkah

Partying in Secret

Jimmy Smits and the Riots!

The Fossil Song
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(Some of these are words/ideas straight up lifted from Deleuze & Guattari’s introduction to their book a thousand plateaus [which I was recently made to read] and luckily for me, their “rhizomatic” approach to systems of knowledge seems to preclude the possibility of plagiarism and so they can’t sue me for stealing from them. Suckers!)
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