Friday, February 7, 2014

Abstract.


So I have myself a little job working in the library at school. I’m one of a few student assistants helping with an archiving project that involves digitizing several decades’ worth of Master Thesis projects. To some people that might sound boring as all fuck, but those people don’t read this blog anyway. I find it to be completely FASCINATING and I fear that I am going to end up falling in love with Library Science, but that’s a whole other story.

This story is about how one of the things I do is (basically) review and upload each thesis abstract. Essentially I spend hours reading these super short little summaries of each thesis and there’s no telling what they will be about from one to the next and some of them get extremely technical. Well I have absolutely fallen in love with the weird, super-specific, and obscurant language of these things. It is as if there is a bizarre sub-language going on that I never knew about before; both mysterious and strange. So here now I will share with you some of my favorite thesis titles (so far):

- Vector Photon Miss Distance Indicator Ground Station
- EEG and Behavioral Correlates of Amnesia Induced by Pentylenetetrazol in Chicks
- Comfortable Interpersonal Distance as Perceived by Educationally Handicapped Children
- An Electronically and Mechanically Tunable X-Band Gunn Oscillator
- Defensive Attribution of Responsibility for a Happy Accident


(BTW, I’m not making fun of this weirdness, I do genuinely love it.)




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