Have you seen this bullshit?!
Michael Bay May or May Not be Sorry for Armageddon.
Now you may or may not know this about me, but I LOVE the movie Armageddon and so do you. As huge, big budget, explosion-filled craptacular extravaganzas go, it is basically the bee’s knees. Name me a move that is larger, dumber, more earnest and yet somehow still touching? Go on, I dare you. Name one … well, whatever you just said is bullshit because Armageddon is better.
Just to be clear:
Is Michael Bay a good director? No, no he is not.
Is Armageddon “good” in the way that we usually mean when we say that a movie is “good”? No, no it is not.
Is it a stunningly perfect piece of summer blockbuster Americana? Yes, yes it is. Right up there with Top Gun, only BETTER. YEah, I said it. In whatever weird sub-category of film these things exist in, Armageddon is better. It is basically perfect. I mean it even has Ben Affleck in it doing his “acting”!
And don’t you dare for one second pretend that you doing cry like a little girl at the end when Bruce Willis is telling Liv Tyler how much he loves her. You do. You cry EVERY SINGLE TIME, thereby proving that - contrary to common opinion - a tiny human heart does beat somewhere inside your chest cavity.
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