Screw in a Lightbulb.

Screw in a Lightbulb

by james bezerra

How many light bulbs

will never be screwed in at all?

Lost. Broken. Deemed inefficient.

Light bulbs, forever

without a punchline.

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A Light Bulb Joke.

Q: How many Republican Presidential Candidates does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: What?! President Obama let the light bulb burn out? That’s because he’s a socialist! And Black, but we won’t ever actually say that out loud.

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Joke Writing is Hard.

Not that long ago I was goaded into coming up with some accountant jokes. I think that we all knew this would be a regrettable endeavor from the outset, but I gave it a shot anyway.

Oh, and before you get all like, “Oh holy hell those aren’t technically even jokes!”, I would just like to say, you try making up some occupation-specific jokes while you’re busy doing other things and let’s see how you do (and don’t try to half-ass it by chosing a funny profession like a clown or a proctologist either).

Here you go:

Joke #1.
How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb?
None, if accountants could work with their hands then they wouldn’t be accountants in the first place. Also, that’s what Maintenance is for.

Joke #2
ACCOUNTANT 1: Hey, do you think I can write off this burnt out light bulb from joke #1 as depreciated inventory?
ACCOUNTANT 2: Sure, if you like prison food.

Joke #3
What’s the difference between an accountant and an abacus?
The abacus probably doesn’t have a drinking problem.

Joke #4
Q: How many accountants can you fit in a phone booth?
A: Technically that would depend on the internal volume of the phone booth and the average weight and height of the accountants you’re trying to put inside of it.


ZING!!

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Knock knock . . .

So here is a super fantastic joke that I came up with last night in bed. I didn’t have a pen in my nightstand, so I actually emailed it to myself from my phone, just so that I wouldn’t forget it.

The Joke:
How many pragmatists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
The Answer:
One, screwing in a light bulb is not that hard.
HA!

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