Showing posts with label Hegel. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hegel. Show all posts

Thursday, July 2, 2015

Bad Hammer


Bad Hammer
by james bezerra
I don’t trust people
who use the word
“simulacrum”,
who invoke Hegel.
Which is odd;
I like having
a stiff drink
with a good Marxist,
adore the teenage-y angst of
a mustachioed Nietzschean,
I can even hang with
people who quote
Kierkegaard –
just not in the mornings
before I’ve had
my coffee.
But those simulacrumists
lodge a bur into my brain
like a grain of sand
in a sandwich.
I also dislike the use of the word “cacophony”
because it costs ten dollars
and doesn’t actually do a good job describing anything;
it’s a bad hammer.
How can you trust a guy
who listens to a bag of bolts roll down a staircase
and who chooses to use the word
“cacophonous” as if it’s good enough?

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Thursday, May 15, 2014

Critical Theories Demystified.


Only four or five people alive will find this funny. I hope that the rest of you will indulge me. Or at least forgive me.


Critical Theories Demystified
By James Bezera

Aristotle reads Jorge Luis Borges:
"What the fuck is this?"

Immanuel Kant reads Jorge Luis Borges:
"I have no fucking idea why I like this."

Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel reads Jorge Luis Borges:
"This fucking guy isn’t German, is he?"

Jorge Luis Borges reads Jorge Luis Borges:
"What the fuck do you guys not get?"

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Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Critical Theories Demystified.

Only four or five people alive will find this funny. I hope that the rest of you will indulge me. Or at least forgive me.


Critical Theories Demystified
By James Bezera

Aristotle reads Jorge Luis Borges:
"What the fuck is this?"

Immanuel Kant reads Jorge Luis Borges:
"I have no fucking idea why I like this."

Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel reads Jorge Luis Borges:
"This fucking guy isn’t German, is he?"

Jorge Luis Borges reads Jorge Luis Borges:
"What the fuck do you guys not get?"





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Saturday, March 7, 2009

Critical Theories Demystified

So I have had this thing banging around in my head because my brain works in such a way that I like to try to find connections between the subject matter of my various classes (one semester I was taking Anthropology and Statistics and I connected the shit out of those! I felt like I was discovering gravity). Well I recently read a bunch of the Jorge Luis Borges (this crazy bastard was so Method in the way he worked that he went blind while working as a librarian, which is perfectly funny if you are familiar with the dry irony of his writing). I am also suffering through a critical theories of literature class (it is interesting but DENSE). Anywhoo … here is the result (which is certainly only funny to me):

Aristotle reads Jorge Luis Borges:

What the fuck is this?

Immanuel Kant reads Jorge Luis Borges:

I have no fucking idea why I like this.

Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel reads Jorge Luis Borges:

This fucking guy isn’t German, is he?

Jorge Luis Borges reads Jorge Luis Borges:
What the fuck do you guys not get?

(Just as a post-script, I know that writing something this masturbatoryly intellectual totally makes me into the kind of person that I always bitch about [Like the guy in one of my classes who finds everything ‘metonymic ‘. I always want to say: Hey asshole, lend me your ear for a second. You are a douche bag!] I guess now I should just buy a BMW and start wearing necklaces from American Eagle with bottle openers on them and decorating my apartment with hand-blown glass bongs and working on my spec script exclusively in coffee shops.)