45 Places I Have Peed.

45 Places I Have Peed

by james bezerra

01. Lemoore, CA

02. Paris, France

03. Placerita Canyon State Park (~3,000 feet up, in the fog.)

04. Tuolumne Meadows, Yosemite, CA (In the meadow. Very early in the morning.)

05. 18402 Halsted Street #36, Northridge, CA 91325 (Very long bathroom.)

06. 23851 Arroyo Park Drive #409, Santa Clarita, CA 91355 (Poor lighting. Made out in the tub with a dark haired girl who doesn’t respond to my emails anymore.)

07. 3217 Johnson Ave, San Luis Obispo, CA 93401 (Bathroom just inside the front door. Lots of potpourri.)

08. West Beach Inn Santa Barbara, CA 93101 (We peed just outside of the RV we were sleeping in. Because sometimes peeing in the parking lot is just more fun.)

09. Manhattan (Peed all the hell all over the place! Without discretion.)

10. Harvard Square, 57 JFK Street, Cambridge, MA 02138 (Coffee shop behind a gift shop.)

11. PVD - Providence RI train station - 100 Gaspee Street, Providence, RI 02903 (Portas.)

12. Brown University Providence, RI 02912 (Fuck them.)

13. The Shelburne Museum (The greatest museum in the world!) 6000 Shelburne Rd, Shelburne, VT 05482

14. New London, CT (At a bar. I think. Was it a bar?)

15. Keeper’s: A Country Cafe Rt 106 & Bailey’s Mill Road, Reading VT 05062 (Hook instead of a sliding lock.)

16. 4100 Bar (The best bar in LA! Peeing here make you feel like Sinatra.)  4100 Sunset Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90029

17. Catalina Italiana 346 Hanover Street Boston, MA 02113 (Candle light dinner kinda place/dim bathroom.)

18. The Block Island Express Terminal 2 Ferry Street, New London, CT 06320 (Worst quesadillas on the east coast! Bathroom isn’t much better.)

19. Deja Vu, Bakersfield, CA 1524 Golden State Ave, Bakersfield, CA 93301 (The bathrooms are regrettably well lit and they make you question your value as a human being/you count your available cash.)

20. LAX

21. BUR

22. BOS

23. LGA

24. JFK

25. SEA

26. LAS

27. SLC

28. LHR

29. CDG

30. LTN

31. The 1st & 3rd floors of Jerome Richfield Hall Northridge, CA 91325 (I don’t pee on the 
2nd floor.)

32. 829 East Kensington Road Los Angeles, CA 90026 (2nd floor Egyptian-themed tile.)

33. 25016 Walnut Street #10 Newhall, CA 91321 (Red plastic shower curtain. Somehow the best sex happens in the poorest places.)

34. That one place in Brooklyn, just across the bridge from Manhattan, that’s between a yogurt place and a pizza-by-the-slice place

35. Michael Jordan’s Steak House NYC 23 Vanderbilt Ave New York City, NY 10017 (Where we got hedge fund guys to buy us drinks by sending my brother’s underage girlfriend to ask for them.)

36. 25016 Walnut Street #22 Newhall CA, 91321 (Hardwood floors. Big master bedroom.)

37. 9826 Reagan Road #218 San Diego, CA 92126 (Two bed, two bath, or pee from the balcony to the pool.)

38. 10292 Camino Ruiz #5 San Diego, CA 92126 (Bathroom is through the bedroom. On the right.)

39. The San Diego Pet Memorial Park 8995 Crestmar Pt. San Diego, CA 92121 (Down the hill there’s a bathroom in amongst the ruins.)

40. Pear Lake CA, Latitude: 38.8918521   Longitude: -120.2568578 (Phoenix toilet.)

41. The Auction House (Quite possibly the coolest little bar in the world!) 300 East 89th St, New York, NY 10128

42. Ben & Jerry’s Factory 1281 Waterbury-Stowe Rd, Waterbury, VT 05676 (Hippies. Standard bathrooms.)

43. Trinity Church Boston 206 Clarendon St, Boston, MA 02116 (Just kinda awesome. You should go there.)

44. Parson’s Landing, Catalina CA (One of my favorite places ever.) Latitude: 33-28'22'' N Longitude: 118-33'06'' W

45. Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum (One of my favorite museums.) 280 The Fenway Boston, MA 02115.

(This list was much more difficult to compile than I had ever expected! You try putting one together! If you do, I will post it.)

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Aimee Bender Loves Me, and Other News . . .

So hello dear blog. I have missed you. It has been a busybusybusy week, but I have thought longingly of you during the calm and quiet moments and I have longed to caress these keys and to be near you.

And stuff.

Anywhoo, so last Friday Violet and I went to a literary pub crawl in Silver Lake (which for those of you who aren’t totally hipster and cool like me, is the most hipster and cool part of LA. Jenny Lewis still has an apartment out there). We went because my most favoritest professor was one of the readers (world-renowned badass Martin Pouson). You want to know who one of the other readers was? Calm down, I will tell you! It was Aimee Bender! She is one of my favorite authors and she has always been special to be because her collection “Girl in the Flammable Skirt” was one of those books I read when I was still trying to figure out how I write. It is one of those books that made me go, “You’re allowed to write like this?”

Anyway, I love her dearly and while I have seen her speak before, I have never seen her read. It, and she, was delightful.

Also of note, this was my first night out drinking since I stopped drinking and, I am happy to say, I did not drink. I really didn’t even have the urge to. Well, that’s not totally true, but it’s true enough. What I did was drink Red Bull on the rocks all night so not only was I not drunk, I was on the complete other end of the spectrum of sobriety. I was super-not-drunk. Now at some point we will have to have the conversation about how I am just tricking my brain with a different but no less stimulating mixture of chemicals, but we will do that some other time.

OH! Also of note, ended up at this awesome bar called the 4100 Bar and let me tell you, between the low light and the leather booths and the actually good music being played too loud, it is like one of my favorite places. It is also, quite sadly, within walking distance of the place I used to live in Echo Park. If only I had known about it then maybe I wouldn’t have been so bitter and lonely when I lived there. But alas, it doesn’t matter now. But if you ever have the chance, check it out.

I have to head off to class now (History of the World from 1945) but I will meet up with you again later dear blog.

I am done editing the college literary journal (The Northridge Review, on stands March 12!) and my accelerated health Science Class ends in a few weeks, so soon I will be with you much more often.

TTFN.

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