Sunday, February 27, 2011

Pretentiously Obscure (and Stupid) Literary Rhymes about Sweets and Snacks.

Pretentiously Obscure (and Stupid) Literary Rhymes about Sweets and Snacks
by james bezerra


If Tristram Shandy
offered me some candy,
I would take all of it which had nougat!

If I had to go to the Congo,
I’d like to go with Marlow,
because he always has chocolate!

If Captain Ahab made kettle corn
on our trip ‘round Africa’s horn,
I would probably eat all of it!

If Natty Bumppo
fried up a sugary churro
and didn’t give me some, I’d pitch a nasty fit!

If I saw a warm bear claw
that was also craved by Dracula,
I would totally risk gettin’ bit!

If young Dorian Gray
stole my Milkyway
I’d tell him where he could shove it!

If Mrs. Dinsmore
had only one more s’more,
I would suggest a 50/50 split!

If Billy Pilgrim made a stop
to give me a lollipop,
I would totally lick it!

But if the Marquis de Sade thought
I’d take his free cream-filled donut,
He would suffer quite the disappointment!


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1 comment:

Jose said...

If Frankenstein rose
and bought you spicy Cheetos,
would it be the brand you covet?



Sorry.