Sunday, September 21, 2014

An Odd Dream I Had Recently.


An odd dream I had recently:

During a nap the other day I had a dream that I was a grown man in the house that I grew up in and that I needed to change my clothes because there was some sort of important party outside. So I went to my old room (the one that I shared with two different brothers at two different times). I knew that I didn’t have any clean clothes so I would need to dig in the hamper. In my room there was a bed blocking the closet (which was not actually in the proper place anyway). My father was laying on the bed playing a videogame and so I had to climb over him to him to get to the hamper. I was very apologetic about it. I started digging through the hamper and at some point it occurred to me that the party going on in the backyard was actually some sort of political nominating convention and everyone was wearing sleepwear with the names of their candidates. Well I found a pair of Obama long johns and tossed them aside. I was actually looking for my Hillary boxers, but couldn’t seem to find them. Well eventually I did (all the way at the bottom) and I tossed those aside as well. Then I turned back to crawl back over my father, but he wasn’t my father anymore, he was President Obama laying there playing video games and so I apologized appropriately as I crawled quickly over him. Then however I realized how awkward it was that right there with him in the room I was about to put on my Hillary boxers and go out to the party. I remember feeling very guilty and uncomfortable about this, so I stepped into a different closet (which is actually the closet that physically existed in that room when I grew up) and I changed into my Hillary boxers out of his eyeline. Then I was about to head out to the convention in the back yard but when I came out of the closet something had changed and even though it was still my boyhood bedroom, it was also the rehearsal set for the Jimmy Fallon show where I was working now, apparently. I like Jimmy Fallon and I think he’s a good late-night host, but I don’t revere the guy or anything, so it was weird that I felt so nervous. Quickly though I realized that I wasn’t me exactly, I was just some person who worked there and Jimmy was sitting there on the bed and I sat down next to him because I had been working up the nerve to tell him that I could do more on the show and that I wanted to work my way up. At some point while I’m telling him this though, the bed is not a bed anymore, it is some sort of flying steel craft, like some sort soaring garbage scow in the San Francisco of a Star Trek movie and Jimmy and I are both clinging onto its metal shell while we are whizzing through the air and I am yelling over the howl of the wind how hard I am willing to work, but this whole time we are also shooting Nerf guns at each other and neither one of us seems concerned about the height, and the speed we’re traveling at, but I have a tight black ball of nerves in my gut, as if this is the most important conversation we have ever had and I’m saying to him something along the lines of, “I can do really well as a PA and then I would like to start submitting pieces to the writers’ room because I think that you will all see that I can write good stuff and then I will be in the writers’ room and then I will pretty quickly end up running the writers’ room and then I will be the writer and I will do all of the writing.” At some point in all that I blinked though or something because I’m not on a floating garbage scow anymore, I’m actually sitting in a very dark room that looks like something out of Blade Runner  and it isn’t Jimmy Fallon I’m talking to anymore, it is actually Katie Holmes with a very serious face (though I suspect that Jimmy Fallon has simply hidden inside of her body) and she says, with a marginally surprised but otherwise emotionless face, “Oh, no. We’re not even considering you for anything like that.”

And then I literally woke up with a start. It was the way people wake up in movies. I woke up that way. I usually do not remember my dreams for more than a few minutes after I wake up, but this one stuck with me. I do not know why. All of my dreams tend to be this chaotic and exhausting though. Just once I would like to have a dream about taking a nap in a meadow.

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