“Where is my all-female bodyguard detail when I need them?! Probably doing their make-up!”
“Look I know you rebels are angry, but doesn’t killing me seem a bit harsh? Wait, what? I had your entire family murdered? Oh … sorry?”
“I hope that I look better than Saddam Hussein did when they pulled him out of that hole in the ground.”
“Any chance this whole ‘Libyan Revolution’ thing is a joke? Or like that thing in The Game where they weren’t actually trying to kill Michael Douglas? Man, that was such a good movie.”
“Sure, if they kill me I will get forty virgins, but as a batshit insane despot I’ve really grown accustomed to having fifty or sixty virgins ...”
“Dammit, if I had known today was going to go down this way I would have worn my other multicolored mumu/quasi-military uniform and matching hat.”
“This has been – like – the shittiest year of my life.”
“I hope that they don’t make this into an SNL sketch. That Fred Armisen is a jerk! I don’t even talk like that.”
“Well, at least I can finally meet Liberace. That guy was so stylish!”
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